Fine, I am not the most low maintenance person on the planet – Venus that is. Maybe that is because my expectations are too high or maybe I am just trying to achieve the best life possible, which I guess in a way comes down to the same thing.
Disappointments are hard to overcome, but what does it mean if you learn from them? Does it mean you are going to give an entirely new person an even harder time just because of past experiences? That does not seem to be fair, but how are you supposed to protect yourself? We are living in such a sex-obsessed world where loyalty is lost in the many options that are trust upon us. When did chivalry die? Was it the rise of feminism, equal rights, or digital social atmospheres? Call me an old soul, but I never quite understood where the great loves went, the crazy ones, the ones Shakespeare wrote about? Charlotte Brontë? Fitzgerald? These days loyalty seems to scare the opposite sex away, instead of building strong bonds people always keep their options open for something better or more interesting to come along. People are grabbing coffee together like they are following an assembly line, talking about ‘how they are different from all others’, but in the end they are exactly the same – one big painful disappointment. Maybe I was born in the wrong era, but is it really that crazy to expect the extraordinary? We only get one life.
I just want to listen to Tchaikovsky and watch the Russian ballet perform Swan lake, eat croissants in front of Tiffany’s, spread my arms and pretend to fly on cruise ships, find unexplored tropical islands, climb mountains, conquer the world, be a gigantic dork, eat amazing food, watch the lights in Paris, picnic in Central Park, gaze at many sunsets in the West, dance in the rain barefooted, walk with my toes in the sand, cry listening to Chopin’s Nocturne op. 9 no. 2, philosophize about life, write a book, do something meaningful, help others, love life, laugh like there is no tomorrow, and care to be more than I ever thought I could be. Is it really too much to have hope that somewhere there is someone else who appreciates all that?
Where are the chevaliers who turn great chemistry into epic love stories? The ones who would fight by my side instead of against me, who let me fly high without taking me down, who will set me free instead of putting me in a cage, who support my dreams to realize them together. Yes – call me high maintenance, but I cannot settle for something that will not make me happy.
To smile is one of the greatest things life has to offer, so is to love.